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Friday, 14 January 2011

Not a good Week

Apologies this blog is a bit of a rant.

I’ve had a horrible week.

Firstly work isn’t good at the moment. I think it is down to the pending redundancies and people already fighting for their jobs (before any redundancies are announced). I also work with someone who when she is that way inclined an absolute b***h and has been this week. I try to not let it bother me and in a way it doesn’t but it makes a bad atmosphere. Until I know for sure if I’m going to lose my job I’m not worried. I do my job as well as I can and work hard, so if I go I know that I couldn’t have done anything more.

That said, I had an awful afternoon on Wednesday, I had made the big work mistake, and for the few minutes while I was sat with my head in my hand thinking what the hell to do my phone went and it was my mums doctors.
To give a bit of back ground I have been worried about mum for a while as she gets a bit confused and struggles with her words but it has got worse and one of her friends rang me before Christmas to say she was worried too (she is 80). I spoke to mums doctors (felt bad as I had gone behind her back) and he organised for a nurse to visit her and do an assessment. The call was from the nurse, explaining that there is some damage to the brain and mum needs to go for a CT scan so we know what we are dealing with. He was very nice and answered my questions but I am so worried. She seems happy and that is all I want but hope that as/if the dementia worsens she doesn’t get distressed and upset. I am sad as it doesn’t seem like my mum when I talk to her and I miss that, we lost my dad over 10 years ago and I’m an only child and feel so alone. I know I’m not as I have my OH and friends but it my mum.

All this does put work into perspective and even though I’m probably not in the right place “mentally” I have a lot of ideas of how I want to make changes in my life.

Thank you for letting me moan.


Manchester Lass, Now and Then said...

Hope next week is a better week for you Rainbowchild:) Hope all goes well with your Mum's tests. It's a big worry isn't it. Just stopped by from Jane's blog (Rattlebox) Enjoy your weekend. Linda xx P.S. Love the list♥

Dannie said...

Sending big hugs your way(()) Sorry to hear about your mum,hope the scan goes well and your mum is ok as she can be. It sounds like quite a lot of pressure on you at the moment and it does put things into perspective.

Take care of yourselfxx

Rainbowchild said...

Thank you both for your lovely comments xx

Meanqueen said...

I came over from Jane's blog too. Sorry to hear about your mum, you aren't alone, we are here for you. X

Rainbowchild said...

Meanqueen, thank you for your kind words. xx