Busy Bee

I’ve had a busy but good weekend.

Friday night started with a retirement do. There was a good turn out and it was great to see old colleagues who had left. I also felt a cleared the air with a colleague/friend – long story but I felt I had let her down a couple of years ago as she was going through a complicated time (involving divorce, affair and my boss) but we had a good long chat and I feel a lot better about it.

Yesterday it was my Saturday at where I volunteer. It was busy and I managed to see one of the men I hadn’t seen for a few weeks which was good as I had been a bit worried about him. I feel that they are beginning to know me and it’s nice to build up a relationship with the clients.

The sun was shining this morning when I got up which is a good start to the day. I made and portioned up for the freezer lasagne, leek and potato soup which will do as lunches for work. Also froze the leftover chicken curry I made for dinner on Friday (after adding a bit more spice –I like it hotter than it was!). Put some washing in.

We then went to my mums to see how they were getting on with the re-furb of her flat. It’s also a bit of driving practice for me as she lives about 1 hours’ drive away.

The kitchen is finished and I cleaned it and got most of the things back in the cupboards. We went through things like herbs and spices, and baking stuff. As mum doesn’t now cook from scratch much we had a good sort out and have only put back what she uses.

The bathroom will be done by Tuesday when mum goes home and she loves it. They have done a great job and the colour on some of the tiles matches the flooring perfectly.

I stripped her bed to bring the sheets back, although there is a laundry there, the machines only seems to do a quick wash which doesn’t do a “deep clean” wash. When we go back on Tuesday I will give the flat a good clean as even though we covered the furniture up with dust sheets it is very dusty.

We came back and I put the sheets into wash and started cooking dinner. We had a Sunday roast of beef, home-made Yorkshire puddings, roast potatoes and vegetables, finished with stewed rhubarb and cream.

A productive weekend now back to work tomorrow, although I think I’ll be doing much as its my birthday.

Trying to be a good Daughter

A few days ago I read on a forum about a lady who wrote about her mother who was in her 80’s and was staying with her daughter and family while work was being carried out on her home. This lady commented on the fact the mother has only used the washing machine once, didn’t wash up and basically didn’t do anything to help around the house.

I didn’t comment on her post but it has been playing on my mind.

I am in a similar position as my mum is staying while her flat is refurbished. I say similar as I don’t have children and I can understand that there will probably be conflict between the generations. Also the lady is comment that her mother had no health problems. My mother has the early stages of dementia.

My parents have looked out for me all my life, encouraged me to be independent while always been there for me, never judge when I made a mistake (and believe me there have be many), loved and supported me.

Since my father died my mum has moved into warden accommodation in a new town so when the time came, which is now, she had some support round her to help so it wasn’t all on my shoulders.

Now it’s my turn to look after my mum. So if I have to wash each day due to “accidents”, help her bathe and cook her dinner, it is only a fraction of what she has done for me over the years.

I know each family is different and maybe if my mother was in good health we may be having a “battle of wills” with some things and I’m sure the op had reached point and needed to talk, but having my mother stay has made me do a lot of thinking. I have to be the responsible one, I have to make the decisions as to what is best for mum, something I’m finding hard as we have always discussed issues and made a desidioin together. My role as a daughter is changing but it is a role I will, not out of a sense of duty, but gladly take on because she my Mum and I love her .

Are we going to Scarborough Fair...

Well we didn't go to the fair but I had a lovely weekend with my OH at the seaside. I struck a deal with him to help get the house ready for my mum’s stay then we could have a last minute night away.

It was great to have a change of scenery, we arrived around 7.30pm on Saturday and dropped our bag off at the B&B. Then a quick walk into town and along the front, looking at all the arcades flashing lights. Found an Indian for dinner, I tried a dish that I haven’t had before which nearly blew my head off! Still was nice and we had complimentary brandy and baileys .

The next day after a restful night in a 4 poster bed and a full English we walked round from the north to the south bay. It was wet and windy and really blew the cobwebs away. A wander round town, walk on the beach again, fish and chips followed.

Sometimes the non-planned things are the best.